16 Do's and Don’t's for Thanksgiving 2023

Let’s lay down some ground rules for Thanksgiving 2023.

For the past years, I’m sure we’ve all have endured the same or if not, similar events on this particular holiday. Someone asks about your weight, someone asks about your ex, someone experiments with the mac n’ cheese - so on and so forth.

There’s a new generation arising that is tired of the same old, same old. While some family habits are good, others need to be hung up to dry... like asking when someone is going to finally get married or have kids.

Keep reading for a list of the do’s and don’t’s of Thanksgiving.

Don’t Do This

1. Don’t bring anything off the menu: Bring anything else but a dish you know everyone hasn’t put on their plate before. Try it at the cookout, not Thanksgiving dinner.
   
2. Don’t ask female relatives when they’re going to have kids: Some women actually prefer to not have children. Some have medical complications that don’t allow them to. Either way, leave them alone.
   
3. Don’t ask about anyone’s “lil friend”: If you haven’t heard about them lately and no longer see our pictures on my Facebook page, join me in the decision to let it go.
4. Don’t comment on anyone’s weight: No one wants to hear your remarks that are actually rude but just masked as showing concern. They are unwarranted, unprovoked and better saved between you and Jesus.
5. Don’t start debates: Between the family members set in their ways, still living in the 60s and the younger generations embracing the current culture, any debate will swiftly turn into an argument.
6. Don’t sit at the cards table if you don’t know how to play: You sitting at the table implies you know how to play already. Embarrass yourself at your own risk but you will piss everyone off if you can’t keep up. Try UNO, it’s easy.
7. Don’t ask me any questions when I come back from “stepping out”: If you know, you know.
8. Don’t touch the TV while the game is on: The remote is off limits. No one cares about what your Cocofelon wants to watch. All of your TV time should have been used before the game started.

Do This

1. Bring something: Don’t show up empty handed. Even if you can’t cook, grab some cups or napkins. Just bring something!
2. Make a playlist of family friendly music: Cooking in silence, even eating in silence is so blah! Someone hop on the aux but for the love of God spare Gramma your Rod Wave playlist.
3. Stay out the kitchen if you don’t have any business in there: You’ll get hip-bumped out the way anyway so save yourself the trip. Also, be prepared for the glare if your dish should’ve been cooked before you arrived.
4. Keep the blessing short: We have so many things to be thankful for, if we had to list them all, we’d be here all day. With that being said, let’s not. We can give Him the glory in under 30 minutes, I promise.
5. Shut down slander about a family member who isn’t there to defend themselves: You’re not about to talk smack about my cousin/brother/sister/whoever behind their back (even if they’re genuinely a concern). I will snitch and I will tell your business in return.
6. Set the dinner time an hour early: Colored People Time is a crime sometimes. We don’t have all day to be waiting on you. I’m hungry!
7. Make sure the food is ready before the sun starts setting: Speaking of time, if we’ve been waiting all day to eat and you decide at the last minute there’s something to put in the oven... I’m making my plate anyway.
8. Bring your own Tupperware: Those paper plates are only going to hold so much gravy and turkey before it goes limp - even wrapped with foil. Bring those bowls you kept from all those Chinese orders.